Today, I realized that I carry fears that were passed down to me from my family members. These are not my fears. When did I decide to take them on and make them mine? As children we don’t even realize the impact our environment has on our thinking. Conditional response is a powerful thing. Most of the fears we have are learned behaviors that we picked up during childhood. This is crazy stuff when you think about it. These fears don’t even belong to you. They belong to your parents, siblings or trusted advisors. If you trace your fears back to childhood, you’ll find that it was most likely handed down to you.
My family came out of the Depression era which resulted in intense fears around the lack of money, stemming from their experience. I inherited this fear. This fear of lack of money was passed down to me. When I find myself in situations where I’m worrying about money. I can hear my mom’s voice, “you have to save for a rainy day, honey.” Believe me, I have saved for a rainy day and I still have challenges letting go of the fact that I have enough. I don’t have any reason to feel lack in this area so being fearful doesn’t make sense.
I am very mindful that my family members were trying to protect me or save me from something. Maybe it was the mistakes they made. Maybe they were trying to prevent me from experiencing some of the same trials and tribulations. I know all of these actions were made with the best of intentions. Today, I realized that it is time for me to release these inherited fears. I can’t resolve my family member’s fears nor do I have to own them. Their fears don’t belong to me. Trust me, I have my own stuff to tend with. So why do we take on someone else’s stuff?
It is so important that we do our inner work around the source of our fears. You may find the majority of them, you don’t even own. You can begin to lighten your load by letting go of messages you learned as a child that are no longer serving you. It can be so liberating and freeing when you get clarity in this area. I truly was able to lighten my load by releasing my family’s stuff. Don’t get me wrong, I am not judging my family. They did the best they could with the information they had. They did what worked for them. The good news is that I no longer have to carry their fears.